


All Good In The Head Now?

by versaphile



Category: Legion (TV)
Genre: Alters, Cornflakes, David's Alters, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Humor, Implied David/Farouk, Implied Lenny/David (refuted), Lesbian Character, Mention of Farouk being the WORST, Post Episode: s02e11 Chapter 19, Post-Season/Series 02, Waffles, mention of mind rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-19 10:52:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17000202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/versaphile/pseuds/versaphile
Summary: After teleporting out of Division 3, David takes him and Lenny to an unassuming Waffle House and they deal with the aftermath over waffles and cornflakes respectively.





	All Good In The Head Now?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Usetheladiesroom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Usetheladiesroom/gifts).



> Thanks to Mossomness for betaing and to Hexiva for running the fic exchange!

When David busted her out of Division 3, Lenny was sure she was gonna have the wildest ride of her extremely wild life. No more Blondie dragging David down. He's a god! They were gonna live the high life! Sky's the limit!

But Division 3 put their faces on TV. Wanted criminals, highly dangerous, do not approach. Even with mutant powers, being on the lam means they gotta lay low. 

"Who cares if someone sees us?" Lenny asks him. "Just make em forget. Problem solved."

David makes a face like she just killed his dog. Well, maybe a dog isn't the right choice for this-- Simile? Metaphor? Analogy? Whatever. 

"I thought we were gonna have fun, kid," Lenny says, annoyed. She needs a hit and she ain't getting one. Hiding in a random forest ain't gonna get her a hit. Where even are they?

"We should go back," David says, but not to her. "That's ridiculous, they'll kill us! But-- Who cares? Nobody there cares about us. We can't just hide out for the rest of our life! I don't want to go back there. Fuck them, did you miss the part about them pointing lasers at our head?"

Lenny tries to make sense of it. David's been aggressively talking to himself ever since they escaped. He was cool at first, all sharp-eyed and on the alert, excited about their new life together. But then he got all sad and didn't want to do anything except mope about Syd -- so much for Blondie being done! -- and then he started lecturing himself about not deserving love in the first place. And now he's doing all three at once. She doesn't know what's going on in that mixed-up head of his, but it's really cramping her style.

If David can't get his head on straight, she'll have to do it for him.

"Yo, kid," Lenny says, grabbing hold of his shirt. "I'm starving. So figure out how we can get some grub in peace."

David looks at her for a long moment. "You're right," he says.

"That's the first thing you've said that actually made sense," Lenny says, relieved. "So let's get some food. Who cares if those assholes put our faces all over the place, let's just-- Go somewhere they haven't."

"Oh," David says, like he just realized they can do that even though he freakin' teleported them here in the first place. Lenny's gotta get some vapor into him soon just to chill him out. That boy is _tweaking_.

They did that stupid trial bullshit first thing in the morning. They didn't even give her breakfast and she's starving. "I want breakfast," she tells him. "Take us somewhere with breakfast."

"Breakfast," David says, like it's a sign. "Waffles?" he asks, like he _needs_ it.

"And all the syrup," Lenny promises.

David smiles, and who knew that would be the thing that put him back together? Lenny's not gonna argue. David closes his eyes, doing some kind of mutant mental thing, and then--

They're somewhere else. Not a forest, not a city. Some middle-of-nowheresville dump with only one redeeming feature. She looks up to see the welcoming glow of a 24-hour Waffle House sign.

"Fuck yeah," Lenny says, and races David inside.

David orders a fucking _tower_ of waffles, slathers them in syrup, and digs into them like a starving wolf digs into a baby deer. Lenny gets cornflakes. 

"Hey, I want waffles too," David says, with his mouth full.

"Kid, what's going on with you?" Lenny asks, baffled.

David just looks at her like he has no idea what she's talking about. Maybe he doesn't. How much did Farouk and those D3 assholes fuck him over? Well, she knows the answer to that. He is completely fucked in the head. But if they're gonna be on the run together, she needs to un-fuck him a little.

Or maybe fuck him.

Oh, that was a weird thought. Was that her thought? That can't be right. She doesn't swing that way. Looks like Farouk fucked her in the head too. What an asshole.

"You're talking to yourself, like, constantly," Lenny tells him. "And not like, normal talking to yourself. These are whole conversations."

"I am?" he asks.

Wow, he had no idea. "You are. What's going on? You got someone else in there now?" She reaches out and taps his forehead.

He looks up at where she tapped. "Someone else?"

"Yeah, like, did Farouk leave someone behind? Maybe someone escaped from one of those drawers when Syd yanked him out."

He gets a very thoughtful face. He takes a breath, then pauses. Then he looks at the two empty seats in their booth. He frowns. Then he turns back to Lenny. "Does it count as someone else if they're me?"

"They?" Lenny asks.

"You can't see me?" David asks. Then he turns to the empty seats again. "So let her see you, what's the problem?" A pause. "C'mon, this is Lenny. It's Lenny!" Another pause. He rolls his eyes. "She's not the monster, we talked about this--" A pause. "If you don't do it I will!"

"Fine," David says, suddenly appearing next to her. And then there's another David next to David.

"Whoa," Lenny says. Did they put something in her cereal? Because she is definitely tripping. "Since when were you triplets?"

David shrugs. "I'm just talking to myself." He takes another bite of waffle. Syrup drips down his chin and he licks at it. His tongue is weirdly distracting.

"Don't listen to him, he's sick," the David next to David says. 

"You're sick," the David next to her says. "The whole world is sick if they think _we're_ the problem. Lenny gets it, right Lenny?" He looks at her expectantly.

"Fuck yeah I get it," Lenny says. This is the David she thought she was getting when they bugged out of D3. Confident, cocky, ready to wreck some shit.

"This why I didn't want to bring her," the David next to David complains. He gives Lenny a very suspicious look. "We don't know she's clean. Who knows what delusions Farouk put in her head, and it's not even her head! It's Amy's head. She's sick, too, this was a bad idea."

"Amy," David says, and looks sadly at his waffles.

"Hey, you agreed, we could not stay in that place, they were gonna kill us and her," the David next to Lenny says. "Lenny saved our life, we owe her."

"After she messed us up in the first place," the David next to David says. 

The David next to Lenny rolls his eyes.

Wow. Wow, okay, Lenny does not know what's happening, but she's dealt with enough whacked-out druggies to know how to manage this situation. She sure remembers managing a whacked-out, drugged-up David, even if half of that was Benny. But they both remember it, so who gives a shit?

She reaches out and jabs the David next to her in the arm. Her finger hits solid flesh and bone. She raises her eyebrows, then jabs the other Davids in the arm.

They all pull their arms back, hurt. "What'd you do that for?" they ask her.

"Wild," Lenny breathes. "Yo, first David, when did all this start?"

David shrugs. "I guess-- After you and Farouk left?"

"Oh hey!" Lenny says, remembering something. She snaps her fingers. "Your rational self!"

"You saw that?" David asks, surprised.

"I saw everything," Lenny says. "So these two must be, like, more stress responses."

"Rude," the David next to David says. 

"Hey, what happened to that guy?" Lenny asks them. "Could come in handy with all the crazy shit going down. Bring him back."

"He's a jerk," the David next to her says.

"We don't need him," the David next to David says. 

"I liked him," David says. "What did happen to him?"

"Only you would lose your rational mind," Lenny tells David. "Y'know, this explains so much."

David gives her a glare, but it comes out more like a pout. He's so cute.

"Ugh, why do I keep thinking this shit?" Lenny says, grabbing her head. "You need to grow some tits and lose the cock."

David covers his chest. He looks like he's actually considering the idea. "Why?" he asks, confused.

"She _likes_ us," the David next to her says. He reaches for her, leering, but Lenny smacks his hand away.

"Back off, asshole," she tells him. "And that goes for all of you."

"Lenny?" David asks, even more confused now. 

Why does that make her want to pin him down and climb all over him and bite him until he screams? "Oh shit."

"Lenny, what's going on?" David asks, worried.

"We are not having sex," she tells him.

"Uh, you're gay?" David says. 

"No shit," she says. "But so was your asshole parasite. Or bi, whatever. Who cares? He _wanted your body_ , kid. In every sense."

David stares at her. All the Davids stare at her. It's a lot of staring.

"No, that's--" David starts, then stops. "He said--"

Lenny just gives him a look.

As it starts to sink in, David starts to look very upset.

"Hey, back off," the David next to her says, aggressive now. "I don't like people who hurt us."

"He's already sick, don't make him worse," the David next to David says. He puts his arm around David. "Look, forget about that. It's over, he's gone, we don't have to think about him ever again. Right?"

"Yeah," the David next to her says. "Hey, do I ever agree with him?" He points at the David next to David. "No, I don't, because he's always wrong. But he's right about this. Just forget it. You forgot lots of stuff, it's fine."

"It's fine," David echoes. Then he seems to come back to himself. "You're right. You're right, it's fine. We're fine."

"Lemme tell you what we're gonna do," Lenny tells them, taking advantage of the rare agreement among the Davids. "We're gonna finish eating and then we're gonna get some drugs and we are gonna hole up and get off our tits, you get me? And all four of us are gonna leave all this bullshit behind us like the best pals we are. We cool?"

"Uh, yeah," David agrees. He still looks shaky, but he takes another forkful of waffle and that puts the color back in his cheeks. "That's-- A really good idea, Lenny." He musters a smile for her.

He's still cute, but when she thinks about where her feelings are coming from-- That kills them real fast. They're not her feelings and fuck Farouk for leaving them behind in her head. He fucked both of them over, she's not gonna let him make her fuck David. David's her friend and she's the only friend he has left. She's not gonna turn on him like Blondie and all the rest. Fuck those guys.

The David next to her turns to look at a TV playing in the corner. "Oh, you have got to be kidding me," he groans.

Lenny looks at the TV. Her and David's faces look back at her. "Shit. We gotta scram."

"But we haven't paid yet," the David next to David says.

"We don't have any money, dummy," Lenny tells him. "But who cares? We have you. You're a god, start acting like one."

"That sounds like something Farouk would say," the David next to David says, looking at her with narrowed eyes. "You're sick, too."

"Do you want us to fry?" she tells him. "Cause if you don't stop telling David to play nice, that's what's gonna happen."

"We gotta go," the David next to her says. And then he disappears. And then the David next to David disappears, too.

But Lenny doesn't think they're gone. She thinks they're all sitting across from her, eyes wide, fork in hand. 

"Hey, kid," Lenny says to him. "Wanna have some fun?"

David nods. "But where should we--"

"I'll do the driving," Lenny tells him. "How many years were we stuck in that shithole mental hospital? The world is our oyster. We just gotta open it up."

The waitress is staring at them now. Time to bug out again.

Lenny holds out her hand and David takes it. They smile at each other. She can see all the Davids in him now that she knows what she's looking for: defensive and cocky, vulnerable and needy, critical and concerned. It's not that weird that they're separate like that. Everybody talks to themselves. So what if David's selves talk back? It just means she's got three gods for a best friend instead of one. 

This is definitely gonna be the wildest ride of Lenny's life.


End file.
